O LORD JESUS - Teach Me How To Know Who Is
 
Safe To Date & Marry





Christian Dating

 

I am working on this article with the LORD'S help today because of how much I love you, Because of how much I have seen my Christian brothers and sisters suffering throughout the years as a result of the  terrible decisions they had made either on a date, or even on how they are choosing someone to date.


I care about you Christian people very much, and I want to share with you the exact same wisdom the LORD has given unto me on the topic of what to look for in a new friend, and how to actually date safely in this day and age when evil is rampant everywhere!


This article is going to be very strict! The reason why is, because of how much I love my brothers and sisters in CHRIST and because CHRIST is strict too when it comes to the decision making that his church body makes on a day to day basis. JESUS wants us to make good decisions, amen to that!


I dedicate this article to all of the people who have called me late at night with tears in their eyes. People crying on the phone because of the bad decisions they either made on a date, or because they did not know what signs to look for in their brand new Christian friend. Now they are falling in love with this same person who was either never really a Christian to begin with, or who is leading them down a destructive path of sinning and it seems like there is no way out.


Because of our mistakes in dating, and not knowing what to look for in a brand new Christian person, many of us are now in the dark valley of death and despair, and for some of us, our entire relationship with the LORD and the bible has been harmed very badly because of this.

This article is for you!!!!

 


Part 1  of this article is going to offer a lot of godly wisdom which JESUS has taught me on what signs to look for in a brand new Christian dating partner.


Part 2  is going to focus on – How do we know, or how can we be sure that we ourselves are even ready to date in the first place.


Part 3  of the article is going to give some really good and safe advice on how we Christian people can date safely, without getting ourselves into trouble!


I will finish up the article
with a couple of TRUE STORIES of what happened to real people when they did NOT follow good godly advice on choosing a dating partner, or on how to date safely and in a godly way.


I pray this will bless you greatly and safeguard you from making any further mistakes in the future!


I know I have made a lot of mistakes in my dating life, and I praise JESUS that through it all, he loves us and adores spending time with us.

This article is equally for Christian men and women!!

 

I am going to write this article from the perspective of a woman's point of view, so if you happen to be a man reading this article, please simply just reverse the gender.



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Part 1

 

Signs!!!!!!


Let me share with you now what the LORD has been teaching me about what signs to look for in a possible brand new dating partner!


When we meet a new person that we might be interested in, did you know that if we were to look for a few very important signs from them, that this could save us a lot of tears, crying and heartache?


Well it can. Before we start dating someone, we want to look for some very important signs from them on the telephone, and even in person, before we ever start dating them seriously, or allowing our heart to start falling in love with them.


Here are the signs for a Christian woman to look for in a brand new man that she has just met!

 

You want to see most of these signs in your new friend BEFORE you start dating him.



  1. Does he say out loud on the phone that he loves JESUS and the bible?

 

  1. When you talk to him on the phone, does he mention the name JESUS either often, or semi often during your normal conversations without you bringing up the name of JESUS first?

 

  1. When you are on the phone with him, is he mentioning to you some of his favorite bible scriptures from time to time without you prompting him to say so first?

 

  1. While on the phone with him, is he talking about the church that he goes to, his Pastor, any miracles that might have happened there lately etc etc etc?

  2. Did he say on the phone that he obeys the bible and DOES NOT have sex before marriage? Did you two talk about this in great detail before you ever made a real date with him in person?

 

  1. Is he talking about some of his favorite Christian music? And is he actually naming names of bands and songs that he loves to listen to and worship to without you bringing this up first?

 

  1. Does he talk to you about how much he loves to pray to GOD and worship the LORD JESUS without you bringing up these important issues first?

 

  1. Is he asking you most of the following questions without you bringing it up first -(what church do you go to? – what is your favorite Christian music? – How long have you been born again now with JESUS? – do you pray a lot? – are you reading the bible?)

 

  1. Is he already flirting with you either sexually, or semi sexually on the telephone even before you two have had a single date?

 

    10). If you have his profiles online say in either Myspace or Facebook, does he have tons of women as his friends? Does he have a lot of flirting on his websites from other women? Even from other Christian women? Do either of his websites give honor and glory to JESUS? In other words, do his profile websites tell a stranger who is looking there for the first time, that this person is a real hardcore Christian believer?


    (Here are a few more important things to really consider too while choosing a person to marry).
     

    * Is the person watching a lot of TV?  If this person is watching a lot of TV, that is a very bad sign. What is he or she seeing on TV? They are watching a lot of sex, beer commercials, homosexuality, witchcraft and the occult, shows on ghosts and demons ect ect ect.......


    * Is the person living with a lot of Lust inside of them? Not much else to say here. If a Christian person is living with a lot of Lust, this is reason enough to call off all dating until this person re dedicates their lives to JESUS through - (Prayer, bible reading, worshiping, praising The LORD) etc etc etc.........



    Now some of you might be wondering, how on earth can I find all of this out with my new friend on the phone even before our first date?


 

Well that is a good question. Why not SLOW DOWN, talk to him on the phone 3-4 times for an hour each time before you ever, EVER think of making a date with this brand new man. Ask him to call you on the phone when you both have time to talk, and watch for the signs above to come out naturally on the telephone. If they are, that is a very good sign to continue with this new man, but if they are NOT coming out after you two have talked for a while, ask him to call you again tomorrow night and give him some more chances to offer to tell you who he really is.



What is happening to Christian men and women all over the world is this -->>>

 

Because you have been single for a while now, and even feeling depressed and sad for the last six months, when you do meet a new man, you are quickly jumping right into a date with him without even knowing who he really is!


That behavior right there is single handedly causing much sadness, depression, pain, hurting and even destruction in a born again believers life.


We do not want to go on a single date with a new man, after having only one or two short telephone conversations. That right there is a HUGE mistake Christian men and women are making.


Slow down, and practice having a few long or semi long telephone conversations with your new friend, listening to him very carefully on the phone and looking for most of the signs listed above to come out voluntarily and naturally during your conversations.


After talking to the man on the phone for a few long conversations, if you are not hearing most of the above signs come out of his mouth voluntarily or even semi voluntarily, I would let him go and NOT make a single date with him.

Why?

 

Because we are not allowed to date NON believers!

 

If he is not mentioning JESUS, the bible, praying, worshiping, his church, his favorite Christian music, his favorite bible scriptures, then he is either a NON believer in CHRIST and the Holy Bible, or he is very cold for the LORD.


Either way – It is much better for you to let him go right now before you have fallen in love with him, then to try to break up with him later AFTER you have fallen in love with him.


You do not want to fall in love with a man who is COLD for the LORD JESUS, or even a NON believer who thinks they are a Christian person where in reality, they actually are NOT!!!!

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 HERE ARE THE SIGNS BROKEN DOWN FOR YOU SO YOU COULD UNDERSTAND THEM A LITTLE BIT BETTER.

 

 

  1. Does he say out loud on the phone that he loves JESUS and the bible?

    *If we are really and truly in a close and passionate relationship with JESUS, we cant but help to talk about him almost everywhere we go. If we are really on fire for JESUS, we will talk about him at work, at the store, with strangers, and especially on the telephone with our brand new friends). That is a powerful sign right there! If he cherishes the bible as the very HOLY - WORD of GOD, he wont be able to stop talking about it on the phone, even with a new friend, even before he makes a date with you. You see people, when we are reading and loving the word of GOD, we will bring it up on the very first few telephone talks with a brand new person that we just met). If this brand new person does NOT believe that the bible is the very Holy word of GOD, UH OH!!! Watch out..... I would by pass this person right away and stay single. It is very, VERY dangerous to date someone who does not believe that the bible is the very word of GOD. In fact it is so dangerous, we would never want to date anyone who does not trust in and believe in the Holy Bible as GOD'S direct and Holy Word.

 

 

  1. When you talk to him on the phone, does your new friend mention the name JESUS either often, or semi often during your normal conversations without you bringing up the name of JESUS first?

    *Your new friend should be speaking and saying the name of JESUS on the telephone. Watch out for a man who can only say GOD and NOT JESUS' NAME. That will show you that he does not have much of a relationship with JESUS if even at all. If your new friend is in a close and personal relationship with JESUS, he will be able to say his name out loud. FOR THE NAME OF THE LORD JESUS IS VERY POWERFUL and you will find that men and women who are not close with the LORD, do NOT speak JESUS' name too often!!! That is a powerful sign for you to look for right away in your brand new friend. Does he say the name of JESUS on the phone!!!!!!!

 

  1. When you are on the phone with him, is he mentioning to you some of his favorite bible scriptures from time to time without you prompting him to say so first?

    *For example – You are talking to your brand new friend about your boss, about how hard your work is, about how your co workers are coming against you left and right for seeming no reason at all. Does your new friend come back to you on the phone with words of encouragement using a bible scripture? Does he say, I understand what you are going through at work, but remember what Paul said in Philippians 4:13 – You can do all things through CHRIST who strengthens you. During the many long talks you have with your new friend BEFORE you make a date, did he even one time come back to you in the normal flow of conversation using a Holy Bible Scripture? Men and women of GOD, watch for this wonderful sign!

 

  1. While on the phone with your new friend, is he talking about the church that he goes to, his Pastor, or even any miracles that might have happened there lately etc etc etc?

    *When we are really attending church each Sunday, we cant help but want to talk to others about what is going on there, right? So – During your many telephone conversations, is your new friend talking about the miracles that happened at church two weeks ago? Did he or she mention on the phone about the wonderful worship music that his church has? Did he come out and offer some wonderful stories that his Pastor has shared with him in church? Etc etc etc.

    Watch for the important sign about if he talks about his church or not!

 

  1. Did he say on the phone that he obeys the bible and DOES NOT have sex before marriage? Did you two talk about this in detail before you ever make a real date with him in person?

    *If your new friend DOES do sex before marriage, there really is NOT a single reason to go any further in this brand new relationship except to PREACH to this new person that THE LORD is HOLY, and he does NOT want us to fornicate before we get married! WOW are Christian men and women really messing up on Sign Number 5 Here!!!! People, it is PERFECTLY ok to bring up this IMPORTANT topic of sex before marriage, EVEN ON THE VERY FIRST PHONE CONVERSATION. This is wise to do, this is right to do, and I feel GOD wants us to get this topic out in the open immediately, before we even have a second phone call from this person. If they DO sex before marriage, do NOT get involved with them at this time in their lives. They might be very good looking, they might be rich and wealthy, they might have a great car and a house on the beach, but if you get involved with this person in a dating relationship, in NO TIME AT ALL YOU WILL GIVE IN AND HAVE SEX WITH THIS PERSON. You will give in to his tempting you on a regular basis, and when that happens, your own relationship with JESUS and the bible are now being systematically destroyed!!! AND THE BIBLE AGREES WITH ME!

    If they do sex before marriage, that is a deal breaker! There is no need to go any further with this person, unless they would be willing to repent, to study the scriptures with you on the telephone pertaining to this important topic, and unless they have a complete CHANGE OF MIND on this very important topic! Did you notice how I said to study the scriptures on the telephone? Not at his house, not alone in the car, but you two can read the bible scriptures pertaining to sex before marriage in the bible RIGHT ON THE TELEPHONE where it is very safe for you! The children of GOD are constantly temped and tested with having sex before marriage all over the world, and OH HOW MANY OF US HAVE FAILED!!!! Let us be careful.

    WATCH OUT FOR MEN AND WOMEN WHO BELIEVE SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE IS PERFECTLY OK TO DO!!!!!!!!! Watch out.

 

  1. Is he talking about some of his favorite Christian music? And is he actually naming names of bands and songs that he loves to listen to and worship to without you bringing this up first?

    *GOD loves music, OH AMEN TO THAT! And because of this, GOD also created us to love music too. When we are truly and really loving JESUS and the bible and worshiping the LORD, Christian music will play a HUGE, HUGE part in our lives. I have about 2000 Christian songs in my music collection, this is how important music can and is to most Christian people. Since this is true, is your new friend coming out first on the telephone and bringing up the wonderful topic of Christian music? Are they mentioning the wonderful Christian concerts that they had gone to a month or two earlier? Are they actually naming some of their favorite Christian bands by name? Are they bringing this up without you always having to bring it up first? Christian music is a wonderful thing to talk about on the phone with a brand new person, amen to that!

    Look carefully for the signs on the wonderful topic of Christian music.

 

Now let me take a short break here to explain something to you. If you are always the one who has to bring up these topics first on the telephone, that is a very, VERY BAD SIGN. You want to specifically watch carefully if your new friend is talking about all of these wonderful things FIRST.


I have seen this happen in countless men and women during my eight years of Christian counseling. Time after time, men and women complain to me constantly how they are the only one who ever brings up JESUS, the bible, Christian music, worshiping and praying on the telephone. This is a huge, HUGE sign that you have to look for with all of your heart and soul. Does your new friend bring up most if not all of these wonderful topics first? If he does, that is great!!!! If your new friend does NOT, that could be reason enough to break the whole thing off right away.


But ---->>> Before you break it off with them, you could pray first, you could actually say something to them on the phone such as – I noticed that you never bring up JESUS or the bible first, I wanted to ask you about that. If you were to do that, you could listen to their answer and use the wonderful GODLY discernment inside of you to see if you actually believe their answer of if they are lying.


If they say that they are merely just shy, and feel a little shy about talking about JESUS or the bible first, well that could be true, but WATCH OUT!!!!!!!!!!

Ok let us continue with our list now of signs!!!

 

Remember men, just reverse the gender as you read this.

 

 

  1. Does he talk to you about how much he loves to pray to GOD and worship the LORD JESUS without you bringing up these important issues first?

    *Here we go – The BIG GUNS!!! Prayer and worshiping. During your first few talks on the telephone, is your new friend coming out first and mentioning the wonderful topics of praying to GOD and worshiping GOD? What is more important than praying? What is more important than worshiping JESUS? Really nothing!!! So simply enough, during each conversation is he talking about praying and worshiping first? Or, do you find yourself always having to bring it up yourself because your new friend is not talking about it?    Another thing to look for is, before you two say goodbye on the telephone, does he offer to pray for you both? During your long talks with each other, does he offer to pray for you about any of the problems you might of shared with him on the phone? Did he offer to pray for your dad or mom when you mentioned to him that they had the flu? Did he offer to pray for you when you told him that your boss was falsely accusing you at work? On the exact same topic, is he talking about worshiping JESUS first, or did he mention the wonderful worshiping session that his church had last Sunday?If your new friend is NOT worshiping JESUS, that means he or she is NOT loving JESUS by loving JESUS with the act of worship. *IF HE IS NOT WORSHIPING AND LOVING JESUS, I HAVE NEWS FOR YOU, HE WILL NOT BE ABLE TO LOVE YOU EITHER.

 

If he is not worshiping JESUS, he is not loving JESUS, and if he is not loving JESUS, what makes you think he will be able to love you.


Or, what if your new friend says they do NOT worship GOD? That is a very, VERY BAD SIGN. We were created to worship JESUS who died for us on the cross for our terrible and filthy sins. When we are NOT worshiping JESUS, we are somewhat out of our destiny with GOD! This is really important, for even the angels worship GOD. If your new friend does not pray much, and does not worship JESUS, or worships only a tiny amount,

I CANNOT EVEN BEGIN TO TELL YOU HOW BAD OF A SIGN THIS IS!!!!

 

  1. Is your new friend asking you most of the following questions on the telephone without you bringing it up first – Is he asking you -->>>

    *what church do you go to? – what is your favorite Christian music? – How long have you been born again now with JESUS? – do you pray a lot? – are you reading the bible? - Are you worshiping the LORD?

    Here is my point here. Is he aggressively speaking up first and showing great interest in your spiritual life? If he is, that is a very good sign. If he is asking about your spiritual life quite often, this shows you that your spiritual life is important to him, and it also tells you that his own spiritual life is very important to himself too. If he is NOT asking you about your spiritual life, this could be a very bad sign for you, and it also could be a bad sign for this potential relationship to ever get off the ground.

 

  1. Is your new friend already flirting with you either sexually, or semi sexually on the telephone even before you two have had a single date?

    *If he is already flirting with you sexually on the phone, this can tell you quite a lot about your new friends relationship with JESUS and the bible. I mean does a man of GOD, who is praying a lot, worshiping JESUS a lot, going to church, reading the bible and sharing his life with JESUS every day - flirt sexually with a daughter of the KING on the very first few phone talks? NO!!!!!!! NO HE DOES NOT!!!!

    Watch out and be very careful when you see that your new friend is flirting with you sexually, or even semi sexually on the telephone during your first few phone conversations! That would be a very bad sign.

 

  1. If you have his profiles online say in either My-space or Face book, does he have tons of women as his friends? Does he have a lot of flirting on his websites from other women? Even from other Christian women? Do either of his websites give honor and glory to JESUS? In other words, do his profile websites tell a stranger who is looking there for the first time, that this person is a real hardcore Christian believer?

    *Here is a wonderful thing you can do -->> Ask your brand new friend if they are either using My-space or Face book. If they are, find their profiles on the Internet ASAP and take a good, hard and spiritual discerning look at your new friends web-pages. Is his web-page all about JESUS and the bible? Or is his web-page more about advertising himself to other people on the Internet. I think a persons web-pages can tell us a real, REAL lot about that person. Going to their online profiles before you ever make a date with your new friend COULD BE VERY SMART AND SAFE TO DO.

If you men and women of GOD, would only slow down, talk on the phone for 3-4-5 hours with your new friend before you ever go on a date, and look for these important signs on the phone, you would be saving yourselves soooooooooooo much trouble and heartache, crying and depression.


Almost all of our marriage mistakes that we made, when it came to marrying THE WRONG person, we men and women of GOD could have avoided if we only had looked for the above signs in our mates when we first started dating them.


Most of the times that we were tempted to have sex with someone on our dates, could have been avoided by following the advice above and looking for these important signs in our brand new friends.


Most of the times when we had our hearts broken, because we found out one year later that our new boyfriend or girlfriend was actually NOT a born again believe in CHRIST, could have been avoided too by slowing down the dating process, and looking for most if not all of the above signs in our new friends before ever having a first date with them.


Just about all of the times that we gave in to having sex before marriage, and even finding ourselves having sex on a regular basis with our boyfriends and girlfriends could have been avoided once again by slowing down, and looking very carefully for the signs mentioned above when we FIRST MEET A BRAND NEW PERSON.


If you are a Christian single person who is praying for a new friend to date and then marry, you might want to either keep a list with you on all of the above signs, or of course much better yet, memorize most of them as soon as you can.


I mean come on people, these will be very easy to memorize because most of them are common sense.


After all, if you are going to start dating, wouldn't you want your new friend to be a man who prays? A man who reads the bible? A man who worships the LORD JESUS? A man who is very interested in your spiritual life? A man who agrees with you that we CANNOT and MUST NOT have sex before marriage?

OF COURSE YOU WOULD.

 

Now since all of this is common sense, and since most of the above would be very easy to follow, why are we men and women of GOD failing so badly when it comes to choosing someone to date?

I will tell you why!

 

Because of loneliness, depression, sadness, bad thoughts and bad thinking on our parts and because of a lack of relationship with JESUS and the bible on our own parts too.


Here is what I am saying.


When we have been single say for five to ten years, and we have been feeling lonely and depressed for much of that time, we will quite often make mistakes!!


What happens is this --->>>
Because we have been lonely and depressed for so long, when a new person comes into our lives, we are usually so excited, we are willing to bypass most of the above signs just so we can have the wonderful experiences of having a new friend in our lives. We bend our rules on whom we would date, so we can have some romantic dates with our new friend.


We start to reason with ourselves
. We say to ourselves, well he said he was a Christian, and even though he does not mention JESUS or the bible much, at least he said he goes to church sometimes. It should be ok to date him.


THIS TYPE OF THINKING LEADS TO
- divorce, heartache, depression and sadness, arguing and fighting with him during marriage and eventually even divorce and spiritual destruction.


See what happened is, because of the loneliness and depression you had in your life, you were willing to give in on all of the wonderful rules that you once had as far as who you would date, and who you would like to fall in love with. This happens to Christian men and women all over the world, and this is the NUMBER 1 REASON why we end up dating non believers, people who are cold for the LORD, people who love to do sex all the time before marriage, people who do not read the bible, people who do not pray or worship JESUS and on and on and on!!!!!!

And this is why the SINGLE CHRISTIAN PEOPLE are suffering so much.



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I want to encourage you to trust JESUS! Trust JESUS with your salvation, but also trust JESUS to send you a wonderful man or woman of GOD who reads the bible, prays, worships the LORD with his hands raised high AND IS ON FIRE FOR THE LORD!!!!


And until you get this man or woman, do NOT bend your rules on dating. Bending your rules on dating is the very first step to some incredible suffering that you are going to go through in a very short time from now.

Do NOT bend your rules on whom you will allow to date you and hold your hand!


 

Follow the signs above, and you cannot fail!


 

Looking for the above 10 signs in your brand new friend, is the EXACT same thing as looking at their spiritual fruit.

The LORD is actually teaching you here a wonderful way to LOOK AT THE FRUIT of your brand new friend on the telephone, before you ever, EVER ALLOW THEM TO HOLD YOUR HAND.


OH PRAISE JESUS!!!!!!


 

 

Part 2

 

Are we men and women of GOD even ready to date in the first place?


Here are some very important points that we want to really consider and meditate on before we even think of asking GOD to bring someone new into our lives.



Ask yourself this question – How do you know if you are ready to date? Well let me share with you a few of the important points that JESUS has been teaching me about this very topic!

Here they are so as to bless you, warn you and to help stop you from making any more major mistakes in your personal dating lives.

Brace yourself now, because these will be strictPraise JESUS for the LORD is strict!!!

 

  1. If you are NOT praying day and night, you are NOT ready for dating.

*If you are not praying on a regular basis 7 days a week with the LORD, then your spiritual life will be only lukewarm at best. The last thing on earth we want to do when we are only lukewarm for JESUS is to bring a brand new person into our lives which would than confuse things even more for us. In other words ? If we are not on fire for the LORD while we are single, what makes you believe that getting a new boyfriend would all of the sudden turn your spiritual life around? EXACTLY!!! IT WONT! The number one reason why we men and women of GOD are single at this time in the world is because of a LACK of loving relationship with JESUS. If you were to start dating, you would find that some serious problems will arise between the two of you during your relationship. And if you two were not praying before you met, when these new problems arise, who is going to start praying for help now?



  1. If you are NOT reading the bible on a regular basis, you are NOT ready for dating.

*If you are NOT reading the bible on a regular basis, that also means that you are not being transformed into the very image of CHRIST. Reading the bible transforms our mind, and as we continue to study the bible, it literally helps the HOLY GHOST to transform us into the very image of CHRIST. If we are not being transformed into the image of CHRIST, now we have some very, VERY serious spiritual problems in our life. In fact, our spiritual problems are so serious, the last thing on earth that we want to start doing is – Dating!


If we are NOT going to pray or read the bible much while we are single, why on earth would anyone think that they will start doing these wonderful things when they get a new boyfriend or girlfriend?

That is actually a plan for destruction!

 

 

  1. If you are NOT worshiping the LORD at home, or in the car, or at work or school on a regular basis, you are NOT ready for dating.

*We were created to worship the LORD and if we are NOT worshiping JESUS, we are actually outside of our destiny with GOD. When we worship JESUS, we are actually loving JESUS. And when we love JESUS, he sends his love right back into our hearts and souls and his love heals us, it cleanses us, it commands any evil spirits to leave us, it sets us free from addictions etc etc etc........


Worshiping GOD is the most important thing that we could ever do, and it is also the most powerful thing that we could ever do here on earth.

 

No brother and sister, if you are not worshiping JESUS on a regular basis you are most definitely NOT READY FOR DATING.



  1. If you are NOT madly, and I say madly in love with JESUS, and on FIRE for JESUS, then you are NOT ready for dating.

*Our spiritual life must come first. If we are NOT madly in love with JESUS, the LORD will spit us right out of his body. (Revelations 3:15)

Falling madly in love with JESUS must come first before anything else in our entire lives. Even before our family, even before our children, even before our friends, even before our ministry work and MOST DEFINITELY BEFORE WE EVER THINK OF STARTING TO DATE SOMEONE.


What good is dating someone brand new in our lives if we are cold for JESUS and he is about to spit us out of his Christian body?


First comes our spiritual life, and long after our spiritual life is healthy and on a good path, should we think about praying for a new friend to fall in love with.

 

 

  1. If you Cannot say that JESUS is by far your best friend, you are probably NOT ready for dating.

*We want to make JESUS the love of our life, even loving him more than we love our mom and dad put together. The only way we can do this is by building up a wonderful and loving friendship with him. To build up a loving friendship with JESUS takes time! We must spend the time with JESUS and the bible so as to build up a wonderful, deep, intimate and powerful loving friendship with the LORD.


Listen brothers and sisters, what good is dating a new person going to do for us, if our own friendship with JESUS is falling completely apart, or was no good to being with?


First we must spend the time with JESUS and the bible to work on a powerful and passionate loving friendship with JESUS, then and only then would it be safe for you to pray for a new friend to fall in love with and date.

We MUST NOT bypass JESUS and the bible and go straight to dating. That is a plan that is going to fail, and it could even lead a person to complete spiritual destruction.
 

The Christian divorce rate is over 50% now!

and go straight to dating. That is a plan that is going to fail, and it could even lead a person to complete spiritual destruction. 

 

Why?

 

Because we are bypassing JESUS and the bible and focusing way, WAY too much attention on dating, our spouses and the opposite sex. We are taking our eyes off of JESUS and the bible, and when we do that, divorce is right around the corner!

We MUST do everything in a biblical order.

 

First comes CHRIST and the Holy Bible, then comes everything else later!!!!!!!!!!




Part 3

 

Can Christian dating be done safely, with holiness and purity in this day and age?


 

There really isn't any dating in the Holy Bible that I am aware of, and because of this, I want to share with you exactly what JESUS himself has been teaching me on this very popular topic of

(Christian dating).

 

First let me talk about the types of dates that we men and women of GOD do NOT want to do. I myself have made some of the mistakes below, and wow did those mistakes really hurt me.



Here is what we do NOT want to do.

 

 

  1. We do NOT want to go over to our new friends house or apartment for a romantic dinner, and that also means that we do NOT want them coming over to our house or apartment for dinner either.

*Going to their house for a romantic dinner is probably the number one mistake that we men and women of GOD make when we date. Being together alone in the house or apartment can and will lead to temptations, and many, many of us have given into these temptations and have had sex with each other while on our dates.



  1. We do NOT want to be alone in the car with him either, especially in a secluded area like up in the mountains, or parked alone in a private area of the city.

*Once again, very simply, being alone in the car can and will lead to temptations. First you two will talk, talking leads to sharing and romance, that leads to kissing, and kissing leads to touching. Let us be smart and stay away from find ourselves alone in their car In secluded locations where something could happen. In fact, why not take separate cars on your first 3-4-5 dates?



  1. We do NOT want to go in the jacuzzi with them, especially if he or she is drinking alcohol. I would also include their swimming pool at their house.

*No need to comment here!!!! If you are going to wear a bathing suit, and go into this mans jacuzzi while he is drinking beer, you are just begging for some terrible things to enter into your life.



  1. We do NOT want to go out clubbing, or even dancing at a worldly place where they play worldly music and everyone is half naked!

*We are children of GOD now, and GOD has called us out to be HOLY AND RIGHTEOUS in CHRIST JESUS. Clubbing and night clubs is who we use to be before CHRIST. Now that we are born again and have the living GOD inside of us, we do not want to drag the HOLY GHOST into these worldly clubs where people are drunk, and are half naked! Let us change now and start acting and behaving as CHRIST LIKE as we possibly can.



  1. We do NOT want to go with them to a heavy metal concert, a rock concert or any other type of concert where they are playing worldly music.

*Same answer as above. GOD has his wonderful types of worship music here on earth, and satan has his types of satanic music here on earth. We do not want to take our dates to a concert where they are playing satanic music and lyrics. This is a very bad way to start out dating a brand new Christian person.



  1. We do NOT want to go with them to see worldly movies at the movie theater such as (Horror movies, movies with sex in them, movies with violence in them, occult type movies and any other movies that are worldly and that satan obviously created)

*Being the fact that we now have GOD living inside of us, do we really want to drag our date and GOD into a movie theater to watch a horror movie? Do we have any fear of GOD in us? Are we reading over and over again in the bible to stay away from all that is evil? Do we want to take our brand new Christian friend to a horror movie, or a movie with sex in it? Why would we watch movies with sex in them and by doing that tempt ourselves, when we know we cannot have sex before marriage? Why would we do this to ourselves?



  1. We do NOT ever, EVER want to drink alcohol on a date, and that also goes for our new friend too. Do not let the person you are dating drink alcohol on your dates.

*When we drink alcohol, we will then say things and do things that we would normally NEVER ever do. Trust me, I learned this lesson the hard way. Alcohol is the ENEMY of a Christian man or woman, and even more so on a date. The same is true for your date, do NOT allow him or her to drink alcohol, that is just asking for some serious problems – Like Date Rape!!!!


We are going to have to UN LEARN everything that the world has taught us about dating, and pray for grace to be able to start really and truly changing how we date another believe in CHRIST!


Up above are just a few of the dangerous forms of dating that we men and women of GOD have been getting ourselves in trouble with. I am sure that you could think of a few more ways you have gotten yourself into trouble with your dating habits too.


Now some people might be thinking, if we cannot go to their house for dinner, and if we cannot go to the movie theater, and if we cannot go out clubbing or much of anything else, well what on earth can we do?

 


Let me share with you a few of the ideas that the LORD has shared with me on what we CAN do during a Christian date.


  1. We Can invite our new friend to go to church with us this Sunday.

*Listen to your new friends tone of voice very carefully on the phone when you ask them if they would like to have a church date. Their tone of voice, and what they say next will tell you eonsssssssss about them!! Take separate cars!!!! If they refuse your offer to have a church date, Uh Oh!!! Watch out.....



  1. We Can go out to Star Bucks to get some coffee or tea while we have some good conversation with our date.

*There above is a safe place to meet your new date, and it will give you two the chance to talk and get to know each other real well in a public place. Watch his facial expressions carefully when he talks about JESUS or the bible. His fruit cannot lie!!!



  1. We Can invite them to the bookstore, and have a date there which is a lot of fun.

*I have done that with a Christian lady a long time ago, and it was fun. We got some good hot tea to drink, and we hung out at the local book store on their leather chairs talking for a few hours. It is fun and safe!



  1. We Can invite them to come to our church on Tuesday or Wednesday night for prayer night.

*If they cannot make it to church with you on Sunday, invite them to come to your church on your churches prayer night, or even on their bible study night! Take separate cars!!!



  1. We Can get a nice dinner at a public restaurant!

*Dinner at his house is a NO!!!! But a nice dinner at a romantic restaurant should be a safe place to meet and talk and have fun! If I was a woman, I would take separate cars!!! Of course I am a man :)



  1. We Can invite them to come with us for other church activities, especially ministry work.

*Is your church feeding the homeless this Saturday? What a wonderful way to get to know your new friend on a very safe date. Ask him if he would like to help you and your church feed the homeless people in your community this weekend and listen to his tone of voice very carefully when you hear his answer. His answer will tell you MUCH about him!!!!



  1. We Can invite them to go on a picnic with us at the beach or at the park in the day time.

*Why not ask him to meet you at the park next Saturday at noon time? Invite him to bring some music and some good food; you two can sit on the benches in public and you can look at his facial expressions while you two get to know each other.



BUT WE WANT TO DO MOST OF OUR DATING ON THE TELEPHONE.

 


It is on the telephone that you can learn so much about him. Some of what we learn will be very good, and some of what we learn on the phone will be bad too. This way, we can use our telephone conversations to decide if we want to try to fall in love with this person or not.


Through many deep and long conversations, you can decide quite easily if this new man or woman is someone that you want to go further with in this relationship.

So -->>>

 

What I am saying is, do more exploring about your new friend on the telephone, and far less on actual dates.


I have rushed into dates myself, and got myself into all kinds of trouble!!!


Going slow is to protect you, this is to help you to think clearly, this is to help you to decide without any outside influence if this new person is even someone that you want to date!!!!


When we are on a date, and both people have dressed up real nicely, and you find yourself at a wonderful and romantic restaurant, you will NOT be able to think as clearly as you would be able to while at home talking to your new friend on the telephone. The restaurant, the food, his cologne, his great looks etc etc will all blind you slightly in making a clear and safe decision if you even want to date this man or woman, let alone if you want to fall in love with him.


Remember this article is for MEN or WOMEN!!!!!


If you are a man reading this, just reverse the genders.


This is why most of this can be done on the phone! Not all, but most of this can be done on the telephone safely. After talking on the phone for a while, if you still want to go out and date this new person, then you can pray and find out the rest about him in person too.

That up above is a safe way to date. And if you start dating safely, you will not have to get your heart broken, you will not have to marry someone that is totally wrong for you, you will not find out a year later that the man you fell in love with, is NOT even a believer in CHRIST or the bible even to begin with.

The foundation of this entire article is to try to teach the man or woman of GOD to COMPLETELY UNDO ALL THAT THE WORLD HAS TAUGHT YOU WHEN IT COMES TO DATING, AND THE OPPOSITE SEX.




 

*The world teaches us to go on a date right away and go real fast!
 

*JESUS wants to share with you to slow down and do most of the initial process on the telephone.


*The world teaches us to focus on good looks, money and what job or car he has.


*JESUS wants to teach us to focus on their spiritual life more than any other factor!


*The world teaches us to be alone with the person and have intimacy.


*JESUS wants to teach us that we do NOT date our new friend alone, but to use public facilities to get to know him real well, especially places like church, church events and safe public places to drink coffee or tea.


I pray that this article will sink in your heart and soul so deeply, that not only will you be able to take advantage of the wonderful advice here, but that you would be teaching other men and women of GOD these same wonderful godly principals!


Here are a few of the true stories that I promised you up above.


I pray that they will bless you, teach you, warn you, scare you and motivate you to make these very important decisions in your life concerning dating and what to look for in a brand new Christian dating partner.


Here are a few short versions of a couple of true stories to bless you -->>

 


  1. I met a young and very attractive lady on MySpace over one year ago. I had sent her a few emails to say hello, and to ask her how her spiritual life was going at that time. She usually emailed me back very quickly and told me how wonderful her spiritual life was, and how she was attending church every week. We talked back and forth for about two weeks, and each time I heard from her, she seemed to be doing very well spiritually and emotionally speaking. A few months had passed by and I noticed that I had not heard from her. Then even more time passed by and still no email from her. After one year had passed by I had totally forgotten about her completely. One day, I was going through my very, VERY old My-space comments, and I saw a comment that this same lady had left me over one year earlier. I said to myself – wow! I wonder how her life is going. I quickly sent her an email to say hello, and to find out how she was feeling at this time in her life.

She emailed me back the following.

 

She said hello Garrett, I am sorry it has been so long since I had said hello to you. There is a real lot going on in my life, and I feel like my entire life is falling apart. See Garrett, what I did not tell you before was this. I have been dating a NON believer for five years now and we have been having sex the entire time we have been dating. She went on to tell me how this was slowly destroying her faith and her entire relationship with JESUS and the bible. She was sooooo attached to this man, that she did NOT feel like she had the strength to break things off with this NON believer.........

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See people, she fell in love with a non believer, and got tempted, and fell into terrible sin.

This has happened to sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo many Christian men and women we could not even count them.

As you can see, just one wrong decision at the very beginning of our dating process, can destroy a persons entire walk with the LORD. Is it worth it? Is it worth it to lose our relationship with the LORD and his bible just to have a date?


Is it even worth it to lose our entire salvation in Heaven for all of eternity just to have a date?

NO OF COURSE NOT!!!!

 

The lady above made some terrible choices when she had first met this man five years earlier. If she had only followed a STRICT godly plan, she never would be in this situation in the first place.


O praise GOD that the LORD is wonderful, HE turns all of our terrible mistakes into wonderful blessings.


 

 

  1. I met another lady around the same time as the first one up above, but this ladies problems were a little different. She confided in me openly and honestly that she needed to have sex with her boyfriend so she could feel loved. She shared with me on multiple talks about how lonely and empty she feels inside of her soul and spirit, but when she is having sex with her boyfriend or even other men, she then feels loved! She asked me why is this wrong Garrett?

I also did not hear from her for quite a while, until one day recently out of nowhere, she said hello to me again. She was so depressed, sad and lonely inside of her heart and soul.


See what she learned is this. No man or woman on earth can heal you! Those same men and women cannot even heal their own lives, so how can they possibly heal yours?

THEY CANNOT!!!!!!!!!!!!

 


If we turn to men to heal our broken hearts, or if we turn to women to fill up the emptiness inside of our souls, we are now doing exactly what satan wants us to do. We are replacing CHRIST inside of our heart and soul with a man or woman, and THIS WILL LEAD TO DESTRUCTION!!!!


 
Let me tell you one last true story using a man now.

 

 

  1. A young Christian brother of mine was at a crossroads in his life a while ago. See he was graduating from high school and he didn't know what to do next. He contacted me to get some godly advice and we went ahead with a lot of long and very HOLY GHOST anointed conversations.


GOD advised the young man through me to get plugged into a church full time, to play music in the same church because this young man was a very, VERY good musician, and to look into going to a hardcore bible college. That was the advice that GOD gave him through me.

But this is what he did instead.

 


About a year earlier, he had met a young Brazilian girl who was a non believer at the time. She was also a fabulous musician and she was approved to enroll at a music college for higher music learning. It was like Julliard, but a lesser known music college. My young friend wanted to go to college with her, and apply to be approved at her college, instead of following the godly advice that he was given to through me. You see, this young lady was a non believer, but because he was falling in love with her, he wanted to rebel against the godly advice he was given, and enroll at the music college so he could be with her.


I gave him the message that GOD had spoken to him through me, and I would not bend one bit as we continued our long talks.

 


He did not want to hear what GOD wanted him to do, instead he just simply wanted to be with this young non believing girl.


He rebuked me
over and over again until it got very close to the time where he had to apply to get into this music college. The last talk we had on the topic was ? I asked him to do nothing for a few days, but to pray and seek out JESUS on this important topic.


He came online a few days later to talk to me, and this is what happened. I quickly asked him if he had heard from GOD on which decision to make? He said no, but that he was going to go to the music college.


This young man rebuked the godly advice that he was given, and he decided to follow this young lady to her music college because he was so in love with her.


I did not hear from him either for over one year.


About a year or two later, he came on the Internet to talk to me and this is what he said. He told me that she is still a NON believer but that he still loves her very much, and that they had been having oral sex. He was very sorry for what they were doing, and he was also able to repent and to turn away from this type of sinning.

Of course what neither of us knew at the time was, it is actually a SIN to date a non believer let alone marry one.



Are You Dating or Engaged To Marry A Non Believer?  Please Click Here!!!

 



I gave him encouragement over the period of about a month, and it was time for him to go back to college.


A year passed by and I did not hear from him again.


A year later, he came on the Internet to tell me that this young lady had broken up with him, and that the feeling was mutual. He was very guarded with me, very sad and I can see he had been through a lot the last few years of his life.

Here is what happened-->>>

 


This young man decided to by pass the bible, and rebuke a preacher of GOD just so he could date this young non believing lady in college.


A Year or two later, after they had fallen down in sexual sinning, they both broke up with each other.


I talked to him for about a week, and one night he got offended at something I said, and I had never heard from him again!

DO YOU SEE PEOPLE?

 


When we do things the worlds way, it is only us that are going to suffer in many different kinds of misery and depression.


We must obey GOD in all areas of our lives and that also includes our dating lives. I have made many mistakes in my dating life, so I am telling you this from first hand experience.



I pray
that JESUS will hold you real tight and never ever let you go.

 I pray that JESUS will guard you and protect you from all that is evil, from all non believers, from all temptations and from falling deeply into sin while dating the wrong people.

 I pray that JESUS will NOT allow anything, and I mean anything to take you away from the LORD and the bible, including a dating partner!!!!!!!!

Love, your servant Garrett
 

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